Ever find yourself asking, “Am I even doing this right?” when you sing? You're not alone—and this episode is here to help you reframe that question for good.
In this episode of Vocal Tips in 10 with Amber Mogg Cathey, I’m sharing the two key questions every singer should ask themselves every time they sing. These questions are powerful tools for building vocal confidence, developing your unique sound, and releasing the need for constant outside validation. Because there’s no one-size-fits-all “right way” to sing—only what works best for you.
Whether you’re a beginner finding your voice or a pro refining your artistry, this mindset shift will help you sing with more freedom, clarity, and trust.
What You’ll Learn in This Episode:
00:00 – Introduction and Personal Update
00:53 – The 2 Key Questions for Every Singer
01:51 – Understanding Vocal Comfort and Sound
04:15 – Why Mindset Matters in Singing
06:55 – Seeking Validation vs. Trusting Your Voice
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Hello everybody, I'm Amber Mogg Cathey Welcome to Vocal Tips in 10. After multiple weeks of dealing with bronchitis and just a cough that felt like it was never going to go away. You know how that feels when you're in the midst of many days of feeling lousy and you have that moment where even though you're a rational human being, you're like, this is it, this is me now. I'm just this coughing gross sickly person. I'm feeling so much better, I'm happy to say.
So I just wanted to share that this should be a coughing free episode, which is so exciting. And what I want to jump in today is not necessarily the topic that I was planning on talking about, but it has been such a recurring theme this past week with singers and artists that I work with. It's a recurring theme all the time, but I mean, it just keeps coming up over and over again. Singers questioning whether or not what they are doing, what they're singing is right.
quote, end quote, whatever that means, right? And so I want to jump into that. And how I want to tackle that is
I have two questions that I feel like are the most important, really the only two questions that singers need to be asking themselves when they wonder how something is going, if it is quote unquote, the right thing to be doing. And those two questions are, one, does it feel good? And what I mean by that, does it feel good? Is it easy to do? Is it sustainable? Does it feel like something you can do over and over again? And it's not gonna cause you unnecessary fatigue.
uncomfortable. It's something that you can rely on. I always want that first answer to be yes. And if it's not yes, I don't really care how it sounds. I don't care if you're like, well, like I belted louder than I've ever belted before, but it feels weird and I'm really tired afterwards. And I don't know if I can recreate that.
Well, that's not something that we want, right? That's not something that we can count on.
And the second question, if we are able to answer yes to question number one, yay. The second question is, do you like how it sounds? Because that's what matters, you guys. That's one of the things I love about contemporary commercial styles of music. And that just means, you know, non-classical pop, funk, soul, country, R &B, singer, songwriter, you know, any of that. Do you like how it sounds? Now musical theater is a contemporary commercial style of singing.
We want you to like how it sounds and also you are playing a particular character. There's less wiggle room many times in musical theater as there is if you are just an artist on your own. But what I care about if you are singing, your own music, whether it's covers or originals, do you like how it sounds? And we want that answer to be yes, because there's not a particular way you have to do it. Think about
Any of your favorite artists, start to line them up. Do they all sound the same? I have a poster of, speaking of musical theater, waitress Sarah Bareilles behind me here for any of you that are watching on YouTube. So let's talk about Sarah Bareilles. She sounds very different than Brandi Carlile.
then Stevie Wonder, then Aretha Franklin, then Billie Eilish, then Chappell Rhone, then Sam Smith, right? There is no correct way to sing a word, correct way to sing a vowel. It's what is correct for you. And that's where these two questions come in so darn handy. Does it feel good? Can you do it over and over again? Because if you can't, then let's look at tweaking it. Let's find a way that does feel good.
And two, do you like how it sounds? Those are the only two things I really care about. If you can answer yes to both of those, you're doing it right. You're doing what is right for you. Now, of course, if we're talking about musical theater, then does it feel good? Still absolutely matters. And then it's, do I like how it sounds and is it fitting the role that I was hired to do? Does the person that hired me, are they happy with how it sounds? That's part of it too.
if you got hired for a particular gig, you want to fulfill whatever they're looking for. Of course, that's part of it. But still the two core questions, does it feel good? Do I like how it sounds? Can be the guiding factor for everything. one of the singers that was talking about, you know, wanting to know if I could tell them if they were doing it right. They said to me something like, you know, they were recording themselves singing and they said, well, I'm just trying to find, I'm listening for every mistake I made.
And I said, okay, I hear where you're coming from because you are here in lessons with me. Those of you who are here listening, I certainly know for myself, I'm always looking and working to be better, to get better, to find more successful ways to do something that I love so much. So of course, I understand that you want to hear your recordings when you're working on a song and you want to think, okay, what do I have that I can improve upon?
And also if you're only recording yourself, so you can go back to hear all the mistakes that you're making, you want to catch all of them. It reminds me of this exercise and I think the term is called cognitive bias.
Tell me if I have that incorrect, because I'm saying that off the top of my head, but I'm pretty sure that's correct. It's an exercise they will say to you, okay, look around the room and tell me everything you see that is red. Okay, now close your eyes and tell me everything you saw that's yellow. And even the biggest, you know, genius, the biggest brain there is like, I don't know what you're talking about. I wasn't looking for yellow.
That's the point, right? How that ties into this is if all you are looking for is mistakes, you're gonna find them.
And you're not going to find all those places that are great in the performance, the things you love about your voice. And guys, I promise you, this is not me just being positive Polly. Yes, I am a positive person. I strive to be, and I do genuinely believe.
and know from study of it that our mindset really affects how we work and big time as singers. So the more that we can be looking for positive, trying to speak positive words into our mind, out into the world, the better experience we generally have as singers. But it's not just me trying to have a positive mindset. The things you are strong at, the things that are good, highlighting those, making those even stronger, I promise you that is just as important.
as highlighting every little thing that you think you're weaker at that you could do better. We wanna do both of those things. So I'm like, okay, I get that you're looking for mistakes. Now I want you to go back to those recordings and your homework, is to go and find everything you like about your voice. Well, of course, all of a sudden they had a totally different experience. Then they were like, actually this is really, like this note is really pretty. I wasn't able to do that. You know, just a month ago, I can't believe I'm able to hit that.
And they were looking for all the mistakes because they needed validation of like, okay, let me find everything I did wrong so I can go take it to Amber and she can tell me how to do it right. And this is where I'm like, I don't want you to have to do that. And I don't think it's the most effective thing for you.
ask yourself with everything those two core questions. One, does it feel good? Can I count on this? Can I do it over and over again? We want to make sure the answer to number one is yes first, because vocal health and good technique and having a foundation that we can count on day in and day out is super important. And then two, do I like how it sounds?
And of course you can modify that to be like, do I like how it sounds? And is it fulfilling the requirement of this particular role? Is it fulfilling the requirement of the job that I was hired for?
I feel like these two questions are just so vital and core to everything.
And the more you can ask yourself these, the less you have to look for other external validation. And you ask five different people and they may send you in five different directions. Now, of course, if your answer to number one or number two is consistently, no, I don't like how it feels and I don't like the sound. then that's the time to seek out a professional. Seek out somebody,
Set up a time to work with a professional who can really listen to you and help give you ideas and tools and everything to get your voice where you want it to be. But ultimately, how it feels for you and how it sounds for you is what really matters. I hope this is helpful. I hope it's empowering and I hope it makes you go for it all a little bit more.
You know, any of us, we're all trying to get better, but hopefully you're doing this because you love it, because it's fun. And if we're just constantly thinking, is this right? Is this right? I don't know. constantly second at guessing ourselves. That kind of just sucks all the fun out of it. And I'm telling you, it affects your performance too. If you have been listening to this podcast, you find it helpful. I would so love a review. It really helps me share it with a friend.
And I hope I will see you back at next week's episode. Happy singing.
